I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, beer. Big fan.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Randomize