BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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