I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
Randomize