It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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