she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
