ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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