garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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