member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Found your dick twin last night
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Randomize