Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
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