The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize