Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Randomize
