What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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