I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
That's how pantless uber rides happen
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Randomize