He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
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