i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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