We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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