brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
These 25 People Believed Fake Facts For Way Too Long
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
i wish my penis had a tongue
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong