spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
