I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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