That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
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No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
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I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
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