Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
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