bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
Randomize