A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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