we're making bets on your personal life
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
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