i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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