My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
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