These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
