So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
