girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Randomize
