i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
My day in three words: secret purse cake
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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