How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
