Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
