We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
you win again, gameday.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Randomize