evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
