i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Randomize
