so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
well you can't waste a boner
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
You have to summon your inner elephant
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I came so hard my ears popped.
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