yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
