You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I believe in your delicious
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
