Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
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