It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
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