My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
