dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Be still, my beating vagina.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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