i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
FUCK WHALES
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize