im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
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