Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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