Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
