Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
