so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Randomize
