My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
