just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Randomize
